Today, Under Armour drops the highly anticipated Under Armour Curry One “Championship Pack”. Celebrating Stephen Curry’s amazing achievement in winning the championship, this is the icing on the cake on what has been a phenomenal past several months for not only Curry, but Under Armour as well. For the first time in well, ever, people are actually paying attention to Under Armour as a sneaker brand. But what does a hypebeast think about all of this? We went straight to the source to get their thoughts on the pack.

Under Armour
Under Armour

Hypebeast (real name withheld): I can’t get behind this pack. What was Under Armour thinking? That they could just put two sneakers together, make a fancy box and think that I would buy it? Look, I already have my bots and hookups ready so I can buy ten packs and resell them for a thousand bucks, but that’s not the point. I don’t want either shoe because they’re not “championship” material so there’s no hype behind them. And as a hypebeast, I demand everything I have to be maximum hype at all times.

Where Under Armour messed this pack up was in the colorways. They played it too safe and just gave us the “Splash Party” colorway (it’s cool, I guess) and the kicks that he actually wore when he won the championship. I mean, that’s a flagrant violation right there. Steph won with some basic black and yellow Currys. I mean, we tried to justify those basic things by calling it Batman, but it’s not like it’s a Bred that would have made it easier to hype. Damn, Under Armour, you could have tried to do something different and crazy if we’re gonna drop 400 bucks on these things.

This is how you do it, Under Armour
This is how you do it, Under Armour

I know Under Armour doesn’t want to copy Nike and all, but they should have copied what Nike does. Look at what they did for LeBron James when he won championships. Those Nike LeBron 9 and LeBron 10 Championship Packs are straight fire and I made so much money off them when I resold them for three times their retail price. It doesn’t matter if LeBron wears them or not; what matters is that the colorways are dope, the shoes are limited and they’re made by Nike. Maybe Steph should just move back to Nike if he wants to drop a championship pack worth copping.

Hell, even when LeBron doesn’t win, they still drop the shoes that were supposed to be the Championship Pack and just call them something else. I can’t sell them for as much as money because they don’t come as a boxed pack, but at least the kicks have some crazy colors, especially that Nike LeBron 11 Low that we called “Multicolor” so the kids would get hyped and think they’re like Flyknits.

So, Under Armour, if you’re listening, these are the steps to making a great championship pack:

  1. Be Nike (or Jordan)
  2. One shoe should be gold or Bred
  3. The other shoe should be multicolor
  4. Make them limited (so I can get paid)
  5. Give Steph back to Nike (or Jordan)

I don’t understand what’s so hard about. Under Armour should really be listening to their customers like me who just found out they existed. You finally have our attention and you just messed it up. Make more hyped kicks, man. I mean, I got to make some money because nobody is buying my stock of Marvin The Martian 7s so this is my chance to get some of that cash back.